There’s something unattractive about a guy who insists that women should go Dutch on dates. It’s equally as attractive as a drunk girl trying to walk sexy in heels. Complete fail.

There’s an unwritten rule in dating – the person who initiates the date should pay, whether it’s the girl or the guy. I think that’s fair enough. That’s why women rarely initiate dates. First we know these rules, and second, we probably aren’t as enthusiastic to meet you as you are to meet us. So if you want to hang, then you’re going to have to pay for the bill.

The other day I met a guy who asked me out to the movies. Now if he was just a kawaida friend, I wouldn’t feel bad about paying my own bill. No biggie, since he wouldn’t expect me to invest time and feelings into the relationship. But nah, this is a guy who had clearly indicated his intentions in dating me.

So the night before the movie-date, he made a sly comment like, “popcorn on me.” Then my female intuition went up. What in the world did that mean anyway? “Popcorn on me…” Did it mean that I would have to pay for my own movie ticket then he’d buy the popcorn for me? Ha! Popcorn is only 150bob. So really, I didn’t get why he thought that would impress me. Plus, it was a Thursday, where Junction has a movie offer for students going for 250bob. So really, the entire date would cost him 650 bob, and he STILL wanted to go Dutch? Boy bye.

It’s such petty niggas who just irk the hell out of me. You know 650bob is pocket change. I mean, that’s not even enough money to get me a burger at Urban Gourmet. And I’m a regular there. Just ask Dan over at Galleria. So for him to insinuate that I needed to give him 250bob to watch a movie (that I could have easily streamed on gomovies, by the way) was just BEYOND me. I think the look I gave him was enough to let him know that I wasn’t going to give him any money for a cheap date that he had insisted on.

I mean, please don’t get me wrong, I have no problems with treating a man once in a while. But only when he deserves it. I believe in women appreciating their men when they do nice things for them. But this comes in time – AFTER the guy has proven that he’s willing to invest in you.

And it doesn’t matter how cheap a date is – as long as the guy should provide, then it’s okay. We could even go to Mc’Frys and eat fries for 50bob each with soda, and the guy pays for the date. It shows that he cares about providing a future for his woman. But these niggas who insist on taking a chic to Caramel for dinner then ask her for 2geez after the date? Uh, no. Far-reaching. True story by the way, I have a girl who a guy once did that to her. AFTER she had spent money on Uber going to and fro the date, for a guy she wasn’t really into to begin with.

So anyway, back to my dreaded story. After the movie, (we only got one packet of popcorn by the way, I was even contemplating if it would’ve been insensitive of me to get another packet and some juice or something for us – but I held myself from doing so)the guy needed money to pay for his parking. Can you believe his nerve when he asked me for some cash to pay for his parking and didn’t even drop me home? Hahaha. I actually blamed myself for agreeing to have gone on this date because I had seen the signs but ignored them regardless.

The point I’m trying to bring across is that men should be men. I get it; we live in the 21st century where women earn more than men nowadays. And it’s fine. But the reason women should be treated well by men is that – the guys are trying to claim the ultimate prize. And how do you do that? By proving that you value the woman before you.  So for a guy to ask the girl to pay on the very first few dates? Boy, that’s how you end up single all your life.

Now going Dutch as your relationship progresses, I think that’s fine – but shouldn’t be a regular. Plus men can think creatively about going on dates where it’s more about the value of spending time together than spending money. There are enough tips on Pinterest to go around if you’re clueless about what women like. But if you’ve got the doh, then by all means – splurge!

As for misers? They are a no-no. And they come in all ages, heights and pocket-sizes. Watch out for them girls!


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